[General]
Name|Patrick

[Dialogues]
0|How's it going brah?
0.1|How's it going brah?  Any luck finding painkillers?
0.2|Hey, it's my main man brah!  How's it going man?
0.3|I'm so drunk brah!
1|Frank shmank!  Hic!  He doesn't scare me.
2|I've got a splitting headache brah.  I could really use some aspirin.  You don't happen to know where I could find some do you?
3|Whoa, you totally came through with the aspirin brah.  Thanks so much.  We're like brah's for life now.  Let me know if you need anything.
4|Me and Maddy are cousins.  She'll never admit it though.  She pretends she doesn't know me most of the time.  It's fine though.  I don't particularly like her either, but our parents are close and she gets a lot of shit if she excludes me.  Whatever, I'm just here for the free booze.
5|Easy brah.  Every time I see Frank, I hide it down the front of my pants!  I was here before Frank got here, and when he showed up and started scooping up all of the booze I threw this baby down my pants.  I'm halfway through it and I'm feeling goooood.  Want a swig?
6|Whoa bro!  I can see your thing!  It's bigger than my thing.  I need another drink.
7|Beats me brah!  I was just minding my own business and he came at me.  I lost my wine too, and he is guarding all the rest of the alcohol.  I think I'm sobering up.  It sucks bigtime brah.
7.1|Beats me brah!  I was just minding my own business and he came at me.  I found my wine though, so it's all good.
8|What the fuck?  You've been hiding booze from me?  I'm gonna beat the shit out of you asshole!
9|Fuuuck dude, is it raining?  Wait, I'm not outside.  Whoa, that's trippy.  I need another drink.
10|Fuuuuck yeah dude!  I'll take some wine!  Thanks buddy!  You're the best!
11|No way brah!  Thanks for tipping me off to it!  Frank's got it all on lockdown, and I need to keep my buzz on!
12|Totally, brah!  I just.  Uh.  Well I just can't remember where I put it.  My memory is not so great when I've been drinking.  I usually give it to somebody to hold for me when I start getting buzzed.
13|No worries brah!  I'll go get it from her and then you can hold on to it for me until I'm sober.  It'll definitely be before Tuesday.
14|Britney!  How's it going brah!  Hey can I get my phone back now?
15|Yah, but my main man brah needs it.  I think he needs to call his mom.
16|Hey brah!  Sorry, I tried to get my phone back from Brittney but she won't give it to me unless I'm sober.  You'll have to wait till Tuesday.
17|No thanks brah!  I've got wine!  Besides, if I drink coffee I might sober up.  That would totally suck brah.
18|No way brah.  It's bad enough I lost my wine.  If I drink that I'll totally sober up.
19|Whoa, why didn't you tell me it was Irish coffee brah!  Hook a brah up!
20|Thanks brah!  This will totally help to keep my buzz going!
21|Hey brah, are you sure that was an Irish coffee?  My buzz is totally gone.
22|Whoa, this coffee is super cold brah.  Could you heat it up for me?
23|Oh yeah sure thing brah!  Let me go grab it from her.
24|Brittney!  Brah!  I'm totally sober!  Can I have my phone back?
25|Sorry brah!  I don't think I know you well enough to trust you with it.  Nothing personal, just a brah's gotta look out for himself, you know?
26|Whoa!  Thanks brah!  You totally found my wine!  I must have dropped this when Frank hit me.
26.1|Whoa!  Thanks brah!  You totally found my wine!  I must have dropped this when Madison hit me.
27|Thanks brah!
28|Hey brah!  I totally got my phone from Brittney.  Here you go.  You can use it now.  Just promise not to give it back to me unless I seem sober, OK?
29|No way brah.  I don't touch the stuff.  It messes with my buzz.
30|Whoa.  That's a totally awesome idea brah.  If it was two on one, I don't think Frank would stand a chance.  But I can't fight sober.  I'll help you if you help me get my buzz back on.
31|Whoa, are you giving this to me?  That's a beautiful flask brah, but I can't accept this... I mean it's empty.
32|Whoa no way brah!  I'll take that, and I'll totally help you out with Frank.  Just let me know when you need me.
33|You got it brah!  I can't wait to get him back for stealing my wine!
34|Whoa brah.  It's not a good idea to have that much to drink unless you're a trained professional like myself...
35|Whoa brah!  You have two penises!  Oh wait, I'm just drunk.
36|Paaaaaaaarty!
37|Totally brah!  A brah is always prepared.  You never know when you might have to get down and dirty, know what I mean?  Oh wait, did you say a condom?  Nah, I don't have any of those brah.  Sorry.
38|Whoa, I love petitions!  Wait, what's it for?  You have to be careful what you put your John Hancock on these days...
39|Sorry brah.  I mean I heard he had french fry nipples, but I bet he still looks damn good without a shirt.  It'll ruin my chances with the ladies.
40|Whoa!  The only thing I love more than petitions are surprises!  My two favorite things!  How could I say no brah?
41|No way brah!  Tidy Whities for me all the way!
42|What's up, what's up? Ashley, lil cuz-brah, kickass party! How come you and me don't hang out more? Family's gotta chill, brah. Did you know there's even a Hawaiian word for family? It's...Brohana. You're my BROHANA, Ashley!
43|What, you mean like...Rambro: First Blood? Come on, Ash, I'm tired of this family thinking I'm not, like, deep and shit. Come with me to the firepit, we're gonna catch up and chat like a pair of brahcket scientists.
44|Then, of course, there's the time when you and Madison glued my hands together when we were in first grade--haha, too good, brah, too good. You guys were always queens of the prank.
45|Fires aren't always the worst thing to happen. Sometimes they're a fresh start, brah. Do you owe too much in back taxes to the government? Burn down your brahperty and declare bankrupsy! But go do what you gotta do, Ash. Thanks for the catch-up. I'm gonna go drain the snake.
45.1|Zombie Abrahcalypse...That's a tough break. Thankfully I'm a carrier of so many sexually transmitted diseases, the CDC says my blood could hold the cure to all known viruses. I'll stop by their spot later tonight, but I'm gonna drink a bit more first. Better go make more room for that beer really quick.
45.2|Case of the spontaneous shit--been there, brah. I've got a guy who I can put you in touch with--he teaches how to center your chi, as well as your sphincter. Healthy brahdy, healthy mind. Anyway, I gotta take a leak.
46|Heh, yeah brah. It's something else. But as Director of Brahperations, I don't talk shop at parties, especially when my cousins are here. All I'll say is that the site's under renovation right now, so no submissions for the time being. Sorry brah.
47|Hey are you guys in here talking about OpBRAH Winfrey? She's an idol of--woah! Cuz, put some clothes on! Derek, nice hog brah. Wait, were you guys...Holy fuck this is too good!
48|What have we here, my brah? Ahh yeah, more party fuel! I don't know if you know this about me, but I really like beer. If I were to rate my top 3 favorite things in life...it would be hot smoking babes, not having to wear an ankle monitor anymore, and beer. 
49| Ah, just something I did in Vegas. I'm under court order to not talk about the details, but I like you brah, so I'll tell you it involved a Cher Impersonator, a monkey named Mordecai
--shit, he was one of the best blackjack dealers around--and a bodacious magician's assistant who used her hands for MUCH more than just pulling rabbits out of a hat. Heh. Now, don't get the wrong idea--everything was consensual--it's just that the state of Nabrahda didn't like that we did it in the middle of the Strip. 
50| Oh, you know...just the lingering thought that the way I behave like a souless, drunken, depraved lizard person has doomed me to a life without true companionship, meaning that I'll never know the tender embrace of a beloved life companion. Oh, and also snakes...And running out of booze, am I right brah? But thanks to you that'll never happen.
51|Thanks again for the drink. I still got my wine, so looks like I'll be double-fisting it tonight, hell yeah! It's been awhile since I had me a good double fisting. Let's just hope Frank doesn't see me. He's way too rough when it comes to fisting.
51.1|Thanks again for the drink. Ever since I lost my wine, I've just felt like there's been this...hole in my life.Good thing I'm not completely dependent on the stuff, cause I could sense that hole starting to grow into an infinite hole of dispair and crippling depression.Bullet dodged, right? 
51.2|Well, I guess I owe you my thanks, brah. I'm not talking shit, but that Irish Coffee you gave me was more like regular brahfee...Who knows, maybe my tolerance is just getting to belike superhuman level. Oh shit, oh shit, call me the Boozehound!
52|More beer? You're the bro-stest with the mostest! Wait...bro? Brah? Bro? Brah? Bro? Which is it? I'll definitely need to drink on this. Heavily.
53|I’m still thinking on it. There’s some people I need to call and ask, my life coach for one. This may be the biggest problem ever faced by brahdern humanity. I’ll keep you updated.
54| Beer! The golden river flows once more--from this bottle to my lips, I will enjoy this golden brew with every sip, my dude.God, I wish I could shower in this stuff...A never-ending golden shower...Can you imagine it?

55|Brah, I haven’t known what I'm saying since like 1997.
56|What’s this, more brew? Hell yeah, dude! You’re well on your way to being the coolest brah at this entire party. Not that the competition’s that tough. Don’t tell Frank, I said that.
57|Ha! That’s an easy one. Maybe you’ve heard of him, he was a President...he invented electricity...he rode all the way to Gettysburg when the British were coming...it’s Abraham Lincoln, without a doubt. I mean, besides all the dope stuff he did, think about his name. A-BRAH-HAM Lincoln. It’s in the name, my man! He was the start of it all…
58|Speaking brahnestly...he’s bottom of the barrel. I’m talking a 2, maybe even a 1. That’s just how it goes, you know? Some people got it and others don’t. C'est brah vie, as they say.
59|Oh la la, some ca-brah-net, doth say? This is awesome! Two red wines...damn, I’m gonna look like a vampire by the end of this. Well, it’s the burden I must bear.
59.1|Oh la la, some ca-brah-net, doth say? This is awesome! Really makes up for the wine that was so mysteriously taken from me when I was, uh, otherwise occupied. Thanks, brah!

60|More wine, hell yeah! Check this out--now I got a red and a white. I’m like that dude from the Matrix. The red bottle will send you into a world of drunk unlike you’d ever believe...the white bottle...does the exact same thing! I am the chosen one!
61| Is this just an empty vodka bottle? Brah, that’s just cruel...Take this back.
61.1| Is this just a vodka bottle you filled with water? Brah, you can't fool me--I've got a sixth sense for this kind of stuff. Take this back.
62| Whack Spankiel's...my man, this stuff just so happens to be my silver bullet. I’ve got a few too many bad memories to go diving back into the stuff quite yet. Maybe if you had some tequila, or some more wine, then we’d be talking. Appreciate the offer all the same, brah, but I’m gonna have to pass.
63|Wait, so this is tequila? Are you surreee?
64|In that case, we’re going south of the border, combrahdre! Ba na na na-na na na nat nat TEQUILA! Ba na na na-na na na nat nat NOT WHISKEY!
65|Brah, I appreciate the drive--really I do, but even someone like me who’s been classified as a nuclear-grade alcoholic still needs some breathing time between drinks. Let me finish this one up, then the Church of Patrick will be once more open for donations.
66|Beer...I never thought I’d see you again. You mean so much to me, beer. Oh, sorry brah, I was getting lost in my own thoughts.
67|Woah, brah! You really show your true colors by hooking me up with this brew-ha-ha. I might have to find a spot for you in my startup. We need bright, beer-soaked minds like yourself.
68|Rum? I love rum! Brings me all the way back to prom...when I drank too much rum and threw up all over the girl I paid to go with me. High school was the best!

[Responses]
491b6431-fc0c-49e8-af66-23d2665b879c|I'll keep an eye out.
16a89b78-a98a-47ed-ba29-90f50eb9655d|I think I'll pass on putting anything that's been down your pants in my mouth.  Thanks though.
c349bdfc-4ef5-418d-b22f-af7d673fef0e|At least somebody's impressed...
92846865-273c-469e-bbae-309cab08bb07|Now you've done it Patrick.
51827b77-8175-4d02-9637-b8c1147113b2|I don't know how I feel about this.
daafef40-8f61-479b-881f-53229ca86fab|I'm not sure that was exactly what I was supposed to do...
76dd1b13-28dc-40dd-b939-87a005199766|Sure thing.
68e4a98b-6def-44fe-b0a6-227ddde278e8|Fucking A.  It's always something.  Ok.  I'll see if I can find out who has your phone.
5a32516c-7beb-4c11-b408-59e8bdd13108|You're the brah, Patrick.
708de9a0-29ad-4dda-b7ae-f65a6532b1c2|(Continue)
77cd74cc-0c6d-47ac-a4fa-cbdedc13c922|(Continue)
db5d13a2-6303-45d6-b1e4-2e24a88a2496|Is it just me or is everybody around me insane?
fe212092-e22a-404c-a768-98a336848d32|Right, what was I thinking?
79dfd088-6ff8-408f-b3c6-5c5fa3be2540|Yeah we wouldn't want that now, would we?
252b8967-6160-437d-bf66-fe4bfbe5984e|That was disturbingly easy...
4ca3e043-641c-41b6-8ee1-57c4c5e62a99|Anytime Patrick!
eb8eb9b8-0ea2-4de2-adda-c53c5971564f|Oops.  Sorry Patrick.
00da44b1-cbeb-4ba5-9af1-fcbd904da9d5|Sure, why not?
d906e79b-2365-4399-9add-e666f2037f74|Finally!
b25eccfc-851f-4268-80b7-7efaf1a32b95|(Continue)
def0b66b-a79a-45e2-afb8-b3cbfc6617cd|Totally.
ecfd1225-716a-4446-af30-9587d2e9d8d0|What are brahs for?
11c99c3c-bc3d-451f-85d6-d69a7b1612c9|(Continue)
428be970-527a-4555-bb08-b872fb194355|You got it, Patrick.
a9fc96bc-9a4c-4315-9c23-f0bce2991bbd|The shit I do for you Patrick... Fuck ok.
d6bc83ca-ef66-49bd-b283-996b56d1249a|Of course.  Silly me...
2fa42d92-1f72-4a0b-bccf-0ce99e0e97aa|I knew I could count on you Patrick!
779baef6-a365-49fb-bc1e-4a8528da3dcf|Yeah he totally stole your wine!  Go get him buddy!
e04c0ea6-9b2f-4188-80bb-62192f4e21e4|What.  The.  Fuck?
0ed2aa04-b209-44ca-a97e-5325fe46734a|It's for Derek to take his shirt off.
997ae977-fd8f-4d87-b520-022df56acd11|It's one of those surprise petitions.  We mail you the results and you find out what you supported.
94f1865e-81d4-4888-9344-d0121fc38fa9|I guess wouldn't want that now would we?
9aa43264-8f51-4eaa-b202-f1f35a29b668|I totally get it brah.  Thanks!
a6f43b00-fc1a-42f1-a0a6-ec026f4d999c|*Listen*
7119d0d3-fe79-45f8-a9c8-06e655daa596|*Listen*
76092b1e-1ac4-48d1-82b8-7ab75b2e17ce|*Ahem*
33322a40-57e1-458a-8393-93b2103ff539|Dammit, okay.
11492634-5461-433c-8c9f-fe6c0cb03a19|Patrick wasn't part of the prank, I swear.
ecd8a2a3-723c-46db-ad2e-989806e84448|Why'd you have an ankle monitor?
7e01372a-b74a-48de-8545-4325b23aee69|Drink up, dude!
587142b8-8cad-4b64-95f9-8469b542e8db|And what's your least favorite thing?
98cc2a63-5422-4990-b26e-a387965a6576|Wow. Enjoy your beer, Patrick.
7ef0e60f-2d01-4347-9a45-684debe20776|Er, yeah, drink up Pat!
2f4677b1-5a3b-48ac-90aa-8c1695b5a9df|Never stop being you, Patrick!
5e05c273-c911-4ea9-b6f7-bcda663ace2c|I'll check back in on you later.
a609e954-425d-40b3-bb9d-1e4db7e78228|Until then, dude.
bcd9cfb4-25be-410d-9b3d-5144b23e70d3|I don’t think you know what you’re saying.
fd88ca75-67bc-44f6-84fc-e525b3cda627|You keep on dreaming of that golden shower, Patrick.
b2e134fb-2156-4d07-b21b-b362bd4217b7|Enjoy your beer, man.
32ad146b-cbc9-4cb9-9264-798bce356275|Who’s your favorite brah of them all?
432e728f-7436-44ec-80dd-594d61f4f4d3|Enjoy your beer, Pat!
7cf79ef3-9a71-4a3a-beb9-d42b7ef8ba72|How does Frank rate on a 1-10 brah scale?
f807a59d-e03d-4c2d-b8e0-0598dd723bb4|Right. All of that was completely historically accurate.
2efe753c-72e7-49d0-a623-1c1306629e4b|I feel you. Sucks to be him.
0bf9c4ee-83c2-4dc5-a485-b9304691f1cd|Take it easy, Patrick.
c4da2f9b-a6f0-43c8-8938-4c2e5efa9be0|I'll leave you to it, dude.
33667d2b-b0ef-461d-b330-ae20f4f6a724|Fair enough, I guess.
b2552e7f-9834-4281-a979-db912a4a55d8|Cool, I'll come back later.
7425ffcb-bf56-4d7d-b06c-16fa77bd91bf|Uh, no problem, Pat.
dfe99640-d113-4bd2-acd1-578022503d4c|Let me know if there are any openings!
2807bd60-f90c-4e3b-8cb3-f7ed7a7829cf|Drink up, Patrick!
ba7a85ec-7dd5-4ebf-bbfa-facbcb800a9c|You should watch out for Frank.
7abeecdb-4093-49c5-b80b-1f26ffa6c9d7|So how do you know Madison?
afe667f1-6eaf-4817-a2c0-06438118ee6b|How the hell do you even have a bottle of wine with Frank around?
bbe69817-aa9a-4fd1-ae70-17b934b0de58|Man, I saw that Frank gave you a beatdown.  What's up with that?
ed0fd5b3-76d4-4cad-a05d-551894b9e22c|What can I do to help?
b6f2e33d-cd4d-428e-a595-49197396fce2|Hey I saw some booze under the sofa in the living room.
d8414893-b492-4b35-b54a-e19594851d94|About that favor you owe me.  Can I use your cell phone for a minute?
ae91da60-2dc0-4525-97d9-4543f908de70|Looks like you left your phone with Brittney, but she won't give it to me.
a6c0de9c-51c1-4f6f-ad2a-5aa5effa9869|I guess I'll just give this Irish coffee to somebody else then?
2e3accf5-ee24-4ee9-9f35-c8056953fcab|Hey since you're sober, do you think you can get your phone back from Brittney now?
cbbd3db2-b3b8-4144-882b-08dc0583740f|Hey dude, can I borrow your phone?
0731278f-b7fc-4b45-82d6-0316635e3825|Hey do you know where I can get some pot?
63e24a9a-2e67-4aab-8346-f5a8912e7e85|Patrick!  You're just the person to help Derek beat up Frank!
d76e8a32-8745-4733-bd18-f1c6c0071a18|Ok Derek's ready!  Go fuck Frank up!
3fec9481-68e2-46a4-9916-a75ce446d71e|Hey Patrick, brah, you got a condom I can borrow?
95cf076f-cd28-48e0-adc4-84c193eee633|Hey Patrick, would you be interested in signing my petition?
5062e15f-e0c5-459d-9e39-3e41ee423310|Hey Patrick you wouldn't happen to be wearing American flag underwear, would you?
a501291c-cc2a-43dd-b486-eb95bf09b955|So you've got a smut site? I might have something for you.
42367174-fbc4-4835-a518-07ff236589df|So which is it? Bro or Brah?
aaf6470c-6c4d-4d2a-a487-6800491682f9|See you around Patrick.

[Quests]
bda26daa-5444-4f5a-b7e4-40e50ae2a7d6|Get the Man Some Drugs!
bda26daa-5444-4f5a-b7e4-40e50ae2a7d6Description|Patrick's got a splitting headache.  Maybe you can find him some painkillers.
574049de-6301-4d80-86f6-b8432cb225b9|Phonegate
574049de-6301-4d80-86f6-b8432cb225b9Description|Patrick always leaves his phone with somebody when he's drunk for safe-keeping.  Looks like you'll have to investigate who he may have left it with if you want to get his phone from him.
700aed5e-9c81-4def-ade7-c7f5536a59ab|Fuck Tuesday
700aed5e-9c81-4def-ade7-c7f5536a59abDescription|Patrick won't be sober until Tuesday, but you need his phone tonight.  You'll have to figure out a way to speed up the process.  For starters, you may want to seperate him from that bottle of wine.

[Events]
e1ffdc24-9f36-40d1-89aa-640b2f6dc2fe|Looks like I need to sober Patrick up.  First I need to get that wine away from him, and then find a way to speed up getting it out of his system...
d6e158fc-7a28-436b-97d7-964f38441143|Looks like I need to sober Patrick up.  I already had Frank beat him up and got that wine away from him.  Now I just need to find a way to speed up getting it out of his system...
7941cd7f-ca42-47f7-bb89-b6fbac6f9a2a|I guess now I just wait...
cd875557-57ff-4147-842c-5ee8f4905915|Pst, this is your dirty conscience: if you want to know more about Patrick's smut site, play the "Date Night With Brittney" side story!
d3724ea2-e51d-4a86-bec5-fbe6ffb519bb|Well shit...I forgot that Katherine wanted Rum. So much for that, I guess.
